Pause & Rewind: Drinking for Two and a Half

When we went to the French doctor to confirm my wife's pregnancy, in reply to the usual question of what foods should she cut out, came the unexpected response:

"A glass of wine never killed a French baby."

I was obviously excited that the doctor was confirming the pregnancy and so didn't think to challenge the source of this "fact" even though later research did reveal that a glass of wine a week has no proven risk to health of the mother or baby. Still, my wife has admirably adhered to the recommendation of non-French health professionals from around the world and not drank more than a single glass of champagne in the past 22 weeks. Originally I said I would stick by her in solidarity and not touch a drop for 9 months, a commitment which lasted all of two days. We went out for dinner with friends, and I had to keep the evening sociable by sharing a bottle of wine with them.

Whatever is missing from those bottles was drunk by me...

And since then I have been drinking for two. Not necessarily an issue except for that our drinks cupboard is now an embarrassment: we happened to receive as a gift a bottle of rum on the day my wife discovered she was pregnant which is now one-third empty. That would be me who drank it. What about the half-bottle of pastis that has gone? Me too I suppose. The home made vermouth I can blame a little on my mother, but the majority of it was probably consumed by me.

I can't wait for my wife to start drinking again, not necessarily for the company,  but to have someone else to blame for the declining volume of booze in the cupboard. The only question is: will there be anything left?